i'm totally stuck on the new dido song. As a rule, i try not to fall in love wif commercial fodder such as this, but if there's one other pop song to describe what i'm feeling about that dido song, it wud have to be stacie orrico's "stuck." muahahha
i think human emotion is a funny thing. and humans are funny creatures.. but i dont mean funny as in funny "haha" but as in funny "weird", if u get what i mean. All of us, to a certain extent, hide behind facades... and it seems that this mask which each individual wears on the outside may be a stark contrast from the true personality inside. And sumtimes, its amazing how each of us can hide a whole gamut of emotions & feelings beneath that smile, frown or whatever. I just read an article in the Straits times' "life!" section which mentioned that it takes only two things to expose a person's true personality, namely; Alcohol and mahjong. (mahjong???? hahaha.. so cina!)
i was lying down on my bed, on the fone juz now, but while listening to my friend talking on the other side of the line, my whole life in these past three years seemed to flash before my eyes; the happy events, the sorrowful ones... and most especially, the people who have touched my heart and made a difference in my life. And i thought to myself.. how incredible that some of these people are leading their own happy lives out there and how sad that i'm no longer part of that... Have u ever sat at the same table with people whom u had loved as only lovers could? well, i have.. and the feelings that i felt are quite impossible to be conveyed in mere words. There's so much to feel that i can't really make any head or tail of them at all. however, it's such a fortunate thing that "regret" isnt part of those feelings; definitely not. I'm perhaps even thankful that That stage of my life is Over. Yet, there's always a certain longing in yr heart.. an indelible nostalgia which u cant really thwart. why is that so??
sometimes i wish our lives are like slates; when you encounter cetain chapters that you wont want to remember, you could just erase them off & start anew. BUt life is Not like that.. we have memories, and unless you're suffering frm a memory disorder ala Dory of finding nemo fame, each new memory builds upon the old ones... and they can drive you crazy at times while at others, you think nothing of them at all.
life is so complex.. come to think of it, my life used to be such a bloordy soap opera. i'm quite relieved that things are quite mundane currently.. cuz i don't think my heart can withstand that kind of stress anymore.. Hahha.
looks like this whole entry is just a pile of random thoughts. But the most beautiful thoughts could sometimes be only random ones too... and it'll be such a waste if they're not articulated into words; for only then do you breathe life and soul into them.. by giving words to thoughts. but to end this entry, i'd have to 'borrow' the words of another...
well i deserve nothing more than i get
cause nothing i have is truly mine... "
